Connected Yet Alone?

Connected yet alone? The complex relationship between social media and loneliness.

In a world where we can connect with anyone, anytime, anywhere how is it even possible to feel lonely? In the digital age social media is accessible to us 24/7 and has revolutionized the way we connect and interact with each other. We can share our lives instantly, scroll for hours and stay in touch with hundreds of people.

Social media was designed to bring us closer together and help us stay connected with family, friends and entire communities. It has become evident that increased usage of social media platforms is contributing to feelings of isolation (Song, et al., 2014).

We see other people’s achievements, smiley faces, milestones, happy family shots. This can lead to us becoming aware of our own moments of struggle, our ‘failures’, what might be missing in our life. The more we scroll, the more we may feel that everyone else is living a happier life, is more connected, has more ‘friends’. This can lead to distress and envy (Wang et al., 2020).

No screen can ever replace human connection. Deep connection with another person is based on eye contact, body language, shared presence in the same space, face-to-face conversation or even physical touch. Online interactions are instant, but they lack emotional warmth.

Although a ‘comment’ or a ‘like’ can provide instant gratification, it lacks the true sense of feeling seen. Over time the brain begins to crave more and more of these quick digital validations. There is a risk that we can become addicted by constantly checking for new posts (Hawi & Samaha, 2017) and the pressure of potentially missing something intensifies. This results in having less energy for meaningful, person-to-person relationships.

Over time this cycle can reinforce loneliness even when we appear to be socially connected, online.

How to recognize the signs of social disconnection?

You might notice that you feel emotionally drained after spending time online. You might compare yourself negatively to others or even feel worthless or inadequate. Maybe feeling discomfort with silence caused by overstimulation from reels and videos? These feelings are very common, and they are not signs of weakness but a sign of unmet needs for connection.

So how can we reclaim real connection? We don’t have to give up social media altogether. By becoming more self-aware and reflecting on our need for constantly scrolling these questions might arise:

Ask yourself why am I logging on – to distract myself, looking for reassurance, boredom or to connect?

Instead of just ‘liking’ a post maybe send a message or engage by reaching out, maybe suggest a meet-up? So how can we limit time on social media? Another suggestion could be to spend time more purposefully and engage in real face-to-face conversations. It could also mean discovering a new hobby, join a class or do some volunteering – great places to meet people.

Loneliness doesn’t mean there is something wrong with you. Loneliness is experienced by people of all ages, especially in our Western world and culture.

The focus of this article is on the link between social media and loneliness.

If any of this resonates with you, please look out for our future blogs when we will focus on loneliness and social isolation.

16^th November 2025

Loneliness and Social Media: How Curation Impacts our Wellbeing

Hawi, N. S., & Samaha, M. (2017). The relations among social media addiction, self-esteem, and life satisfaction in university students. Social Science Computer Review, 35(5), 576–586. 

Song, H., Zmyslinski-Seelig, A., Kim, J., Drent, A., Victor, A., Omori, K., & Allen, M. (2014). Does Facebook make you lonely?: A meta analysis. Computers in Human Behavior, 36, 446-452

Wang, W., Wang, M., Hu, Q., Wang, P., Lei, L., & Jiang, S. (2020). Upward social comparison on mobile social media and depression: The mediating role of envy and the moderating role of marital quality. Journal of Affective Disorders, 270, 143–149.