On Being Authentic

Being Authentic

“Be authentic, the rest of the World will adjust”, has been one of my touchstones for many years. So what does it mean?  Being authentic is the key to avoiding anxiety and having strong mental health. It is also the gateway to spiritual intelligence.  As a counsellor I know that anxiety and subsequently depression are the result of one or two issues encountered during life. Being dominated by a dominant personality or being traumatised means we must adapt to survive, and our normal development becomes sidetracked to learn skills that enable us to survive. We divert from being ourselves. We learn skills that help us survive. We may become docile, quiet and blend in so we are not noticed, or we become independent and find our freedom, long before we are ready.  We lose touch with who we were born to be.  

When we adapt and morph to survive it builds up a sense of internal, non-expressed anger and a sense of helplessness. These over time manifest as anxiety and depression.  Being authentic involves having the strength to resist that survival evolution and stay true to ourselves. If we can find that strength and remain truly authentic then it is far easier to maintain robust mental health.

Sometimes it takes a rough ride and the help of a skilled professional to get us back in touch with ourselves to achieve peace of mind. In spiritual practice we often talk about this and label it as shadow work. Working through the demons that have pulled us off course and uncoupling from them so they no longer influence us, and we can once again be an authentic version of the person we were born to be.

Spiritual Intelligence has a lot to do with both finding and then defending that essential self.  Cindy Wigglesworth in her book SQ21 explores twenty-one skills that make up spiritual intelligence. Spiritual intelligence is not about religion, but it is about being able to identify what is right and being prepared to stand up for it.

 I do not think the world has faced so much turmoil. Political situations in the USA, Israel, France, the UK and many other countries have seen mass displays of solidarity by people who identify together as recognising something is wrong. They are finding their voices to be authentic. We should not be surprised by the rise to power of so many extreme right wing power players around the globe. They are igniting the fears amongst their respective populations around the globe. Individuals who struggle to put food on the table due to high prices will resonate with a leader who tells them that it is immigrants that are taking away their jobs. For thousands of years major uprisings around the globe have followed high grain prices. Telling a population that you can bring back jobs into long gone industries or we can close borders against the ebb and flow of migration is an easy vote winner when the voter is afraid, anxious and feels insecure. If populations were well fed, the poor and sick looked after with adequate affordable housing available their support for the extreme right-wing leaders would evaporate overnight.  The world is where it is, and we have the leaders that this attracts.

Anxiety and depression come from a sense of prolonged helplessness. Strength and mental wellness come from knowing you can make a difference, even if only in your own life.  Doing  shadow work to identify who we are and then being authentic is the way things will change. Emotional intelligence to help us understand the feelings of ourselves and others followed by Spiritual Intelligence to fight for the right thing is the way to find peace and to empower each person to be themselves.

Ian McDonald

Oct 2025